frostybossy:
I never said it like that. I just want her to choose either to diet hardcore or be a feedee. Shes been in limbo for 2 years and shes soooo unhappy with her body.im giving her options to make her happy
You know, there might be a different approach needed here. You're applying your logical solution to her emotional "problem".
We guys tend to go into fix-it mode. It's our nature but not always what is actually needed. I suspect it's more than her size or weight alone. She may lose weight and still not like her appearance. She may be in conflict... Perhaps she herself is okay with her size but feels obligated to hate it because society says so.
If you really truly desire her to be happy, and I believe you do, she may need you to understand her. Understand her unhappiness from her emotional perspective, not your logical one. You need to help her see past the surface issues to the deeper ones. If she's that unhappy, why has she not dieted herself? It's not like she's never heard of them.
Open honest safe communication is what I think you two need, where she can talk without being judged or subjected to solutions shes not ready to hear. Of course, sometimes, we do just need a stern kick in the pants to get us going, too. I hope that makes sense and I hope it all works out good for both of you.